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PRIVATE CLIENT NEWSLETTER

Volume 3: Issue 9 | Date: October 7, 2019

You are receiving this letter because you are either a high-net-worth client of Blackburne & Sons Realty Capital Corporation (since 1980) or you once applied for a commercial real estate loan of $1 million or more using C-Loans.com or CommercialMortgage.com. Blackburne & Sons and C-Loans, Inc. are sister companies.

Today we’ll discuss how important cost is in commercial real estate finance during recessions. We also have lots of cute, clean jokes, some funny pics, and a stunning video of a bull shark on the beach with a human leg in its mouth.

Joke Du Jour

My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I kept pretending to be a Transformer. As she walked away that final time, I shouted, "No, wait! I can change.”

Girlfriend's Birthday Joke

My girlfriend isn’t talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday. I’m not sure how I did that – I didn’t even know it was her birthday. 

Earn Up to 12% Interest in Your IRA or Your Kid’s College Fund

It is important that you please grasp the concept that you could be borrowing from Blackburne & Sons against some rental or commercial property at the very same time that you are using your IRA to invest $30,000 in one of our first trust deed investments. Many of our biggest trust deed investors first came to us twenty years ago as commercial property borrowers.

You probably have money set aside for your retirement and for the cost of college for your children and grandchildren. It shouldn't all be invested in the stock market. In California, the first trust deed investment business is huge. A recent law change - the JOBS Act - now allows accredited investors nationwide to also invest in these same first trust deeds and first mortgages.

Please click here to receive investment offerings.

Dubai Joke

Q: What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?

A: The people in Dubai don't like The Flintstones, but the people in Abu Dhabi dooooo.

Ugly Joke

I asked my Mom if I was ugly. She said, "I told you not to call me Mom in front of people."

Want to Speak With a Loan Officer From Blackburne & Sons?

Blackburne & Sons, our private money commercial lending company, continues to seek slightly-flawed first mortgages between $100,000 to $1.5 million on standing commercial properties nationwide.

To apply for a private money commercial loan from Blackburne & Sons, please click on your favorite loan officer below to send them an email:

Breakage Joke

Beer Bottle: If you break me, you get one year of bad luck.

Mirror: Are you kiddin' me? If you break me, you get seven years of bad luck.

Condom: Hahaha... (Condom walks off laughing.)

- Today's Observations -

During Recessions, Cost Becomes a Big Deal

This strong economy cannot continue forever. Sooner or later we are going to have a recession. When that recession finally hits, commercial real estate lenders are not going to want to talk about the "fair market value" of your commercial property. They will be fixated completely on cost.

By “cost”, they mean, “What did you pay for the property? How much did you put down?”  The reason they will be zeroed in on cost is because very few commercial properties will be selling, and when commercial properties do sell during a recession, they sell at deep discounts to their former fair market values.

DMV Joke

I waited for a very long time for my number to be called at the Department of Motor Vehicles to renew my driver's license. As I approached the window, the clerk asked how she could help me. I replied, "I need to get a haircut, can you save me my spot?” She said, "Why didn't you get a haircut before you came here?” I replied, "I didn't need one before I got here!”

Roulette Joke

A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in Vegas. She's down to her last $50. Exasperated, she exclaims to the whole table, "What rotten luck I've had today! What in the world should I do now?” A man standing next to her suggests, "I don't know, why don't you play your age?” He walks away, but moments later, his attention is grabbed by a great commotion at the roulette table. Maybe she won! He rushes back to the table and pushes his way through the crowd. The lady is lying limp on the floor, with the table operator kneeling over her. The man is stunned. He asks, "What happened? Is she all right?” The operator replies, "I don't know. She put all her money on 36, and when 47 came up, she just fainted!”

Here's Why You Want to Stay Close to Blackburne & Sons

Do you find yields of even 11% to 12% too tame? Want a chance to earn 16% or 25%? We put together syndicates to provide developers with construction equity:

Roseburg Marriott Fairfield Inn Investment Bulletin

Please be very wise and play close attention to the following:

Because every loan we make is a new syndicate (as opposed to a fund investment), Blackburne & Sons is always in the market.

When the stock market has fallen by 40%, when real estate values are falling like a knife, and when your own bank is too terrified to lend you a dime, Blackburne & Sons always has a group of savvy investors willing to lend - admittedly at a price - when blood is running in the streets. We are one of a tiny handful of lenders who remained in the market, making loans, every single day of the Great Recession.

So stick close to us. Syndicators are pretty rare, and now you know one. 

Paris Joke

A boy asks his Dad one day, "Dad, why is my sister called Paris?” His Dad replies, "Because she was conceived in Paris.” The boy says, “Oh, okay. Thanks, Dad.” His Dad says, "You're welcome, Backseat."

Quickly Find 30 Commercial Lenders For Your Deal

Trans Joke

My wife accused me of being a transvestite, so I packed her things and left.

Apply to Blackburne & Sons For a (Very Soft) Hard Money Loan

Here is a scenario that might tickle you. You could have $100,000 from your self-directed IRA spread out among four or five first trust deeds from Blackburne & Sons, and at the very same time you could be borrowing $250,000 from Blackburne & Sons on an apartment building that you are fixing up in Boston. Not every hard money lender is the same. Our loans have a 30-year amortization (almost interest-only), a 15-year term, and no prepayment penalty. You never want to have a hard money loan ballooning during a recession. 

Apply for a commercial loan or business-purpose home loan from Blackburne & Sons.

Tortoises Joke

A young man was a very slow worker and subsequently found it difficult to hold down a job.  After a visit to the employment office, he was offered work at the local zoo. When he arrived for his first day, the keeper, aware of his reputation, told him to take care of the tortoise section. Later, the keeper dropped by to see how the young man was doing and found him standing by an empty enclosure with the gate open. "Where are the tortoises?" he asked. "I can't believe it," said the new employee, "I just opened the door and whoosh, they were gone!”

Video - Kinda Gross

Bull Shark with a human leg in its mouth.

Final Funny (PG-13)

An old woman walked up and tied her old mule to the hitching post. As she stood there, brushing some of the dust from her face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. The young gunslinger looked at the old woman and laughed, “Hey, old woman, have you ever danced?"

The old woman looked up at the gunslinger and said, “No, I never did dance. Never really wanted to.” A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said “Well, you old bag, you're gonna dance now," and started shooting at the old woman's feet. The old woman prospector -- not wanting to get her toe blown off -- started hopping around. Everybody was laughing.

When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The old woman turned to her pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air, and the crowd stopped laughing immediately.

The young gunslinger heard the sounds, too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched As the young gunman stared at the old woman and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels. The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old woman's hands, as she quietly said, “Son, have you ever kissed a mule's a$$?"

The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, “No, Ma'am... but I've always wanted to."

A member of the Blackburne Family of Companies