October 26, 2018


Volume 18, Issue 8


C-Loans Client Newsletter

You are receiving this letter because you are a commercial mortgage broker client of either Blackburne & Sons or C-Loans, Inc. Removal instructions are below. Today we'll talk about how to underwrite a commercial construction loan. And as always, we have lots of great jokes and funny pics, plus a short but very funny video of a cat fetching a ball. Total nutcase.


Joke Du Jour

Two mice meet and start chatting. “Look,” says one after a while, “I’ve got a new boyfriend!” She shows a picture on her mobile phone to her girlfriend. “OMG,” cries the other mouse, “that’s a bat!” “What?!” replies the first mouse. "The guy told me he was a pilot!”


How C-Loans Actually Works

C-Loans Intro

Weather Girl Joke

The weather girl reports, “…. and because of the cold front coming in from Northeast, we can expect about three-inches of snow, or as my colleague, Bill, would say, eight-inches.”


Place Your Loan With C-Loans

C-Loans.com is a commercial mortgage portal where you can enter a commercial loan in just four minutes and then submit it to hundreds of different commercial lenders with one click. Please pay particular attention to the word, submitC-Loans.com is not just a list of lenders. You can actually submit your four-minute application to thirty or forty different lenders, until you find that one bank that is hungry to make a commercial loan right now! And C-Loans.com is free!


I Said I Was Sorry


Got a Slightly Flawed Commercial Loan? Submit It To Blackburne & Sons

Blackburne & Sons continues to seek first mortgages between $100,000 to $3.5 million on standing commercial properties nationwide. We have tons of money right now, so we can do some of the larger loans that in the past were too large for us. One unusual loan product that we offer is our blanket loan against a portfolio of rental homes. We will also hypothecate notes and buy commercial loans at a discount. We also make non-owner-occupied, business purpose, residential loans in many states.

Please be sure to bookmark our commercial mortgage rate sheet right now. To apply for a private money commercial loan from Blackburne & Sons, please find your favorite loan officer below:

George Blackburne, IV

(916) 338-3232

Ext. 314

NMLS #382122

CA DRE #01873244

Alicia Gandy

(916) 338-3232

Ext. 310

NMLS #389678

CA DRE #01430908

Michael Young

(916) 338-3232

Ext. 312

NMLS #1535540

CA DRE #02012847

Tom Blackburne

(916) 338-3232

Ext. 317

NMLS #1014118

CA DRE #01919403


Blind Fighters Joke

Two blind dudes are fighting really viciously. How do you stop them? Shout out, “I’m betting on the dude with the knife!”


We're Now Making Business Purpose Rental Home Loans in All But Eight States

These loans are sometimes known as buy-to-rent loans. For the past 37 years, Blackburne & Sons has exclusively been a commercial lender. This has now changed. We are aggressively seeking non-owner occupied home loans in California and most other states.

The property has to be non-owner occupied, and the purpose of the loan must be for business. The nice thing about business purpose home loans from Blackburne & Sons is that our loans have a 15-year term and no prepayment penalty.

Got a commercial deal nationwide or a business purpose, non-owner-occupied residential deal in one of the above four states? Please call your loan officer:

Alicia Gandy: (916) 338-3232 // NMLS #389678

To apply to Alicia online, please click here.

George Blackburne, IV: (916) 338-3232 // NMLS #382122

To apply to George online, please click here.

Tom Blackburne: (574) 210-6686 // NMLS #1014118

To apply to Tom online, please click here.

Michael Young : (916) 338-3232 // NMLS #1535540

To apply to Michael online, please click here.

Loans made under the California Finance Lenders Law.




Commercial Mortgage Dot Com is a Free Commercial Lender Search Engine

We own a second commercial mortgage portal, CommercialMortgage.com (“CMDC”). We paid $100,000 just for that wonderful domain name. CMDC contains almost 4,000 commer-cial lenders, in addition to, and different from, the 750 commercial lenders on C-Loans.com. If you can’t find the right lender on C-Loans, be sure to try CommercialMortgage.com


Adopted Joke

Father: “Son, you were adopted.”


Son: “What?! I knew it! I want to meet my biological parents!”


Father: “We are your biological parents. Now pack up. Your new adoptive parents will pick you up in 20 minutes.”


Learn Commercial Real Estate Finance - 9hr Video Training

It would be a lot easier to close your commercial deals if you actually knew the subject matter. Are you finally ready to learn the financial ratios and the advanced terminology of commercial real estate finance? Just $549.


So Sad Joke


Become a Hard Money Lender

It’s the servicing income, silly! We make more than $85,000 per month, whether we close a loan or so. Just hire a sub-servicing company to service your deals. Four-hour video course, How To Find Your Own Private Mortgage Investors. Just $549.


Camera Joke

Some nice Japanese couple gave me a very good camera down by the Washington Monument. I didn’t really understand what they were saying, but it was very nice of them.


Get Both Courses For Just $849

Save $249


Bra Joke

I spent half an hour trying to take off my girlfriend's bra. In the end, I just gave up. Now I wish I had never tried it on in the first place.



How To Underwrite Commercial Construction Loans

A couple of years ago I wrote a superb article that explains the entire commercial construction loan underwriting process in layman's English.  I teach the reader the five ratio's of commercial construction loan underwriting, including

The Loan-to-Cost Ratio;

The Loan-to-Value Ratio;

The Debt Service Coverage Ratio;

The Profit Ratio; and 

The Net-Worth-to-Loan-Size Ratio

Don't panic!  Don't fall asleep!  I make these ratios fun.  I promise that I will have you chuckling.  We follow the story of Bubba, a developer of questionable morals, as he tries to convince his bank to make a construction loan to build an apartment building.



He Needs To Expand His Menu


Have You Been Screwed Out of a Big Loan Fee Yet?

Whenever someone boasts of being a good horseman, I always ask him, “Have you ever been thrown?” The correct answer is, “Many, many times”. There is an old saying, “If you ain’t been thrown, you ain't ridden very much.” The same is unfortunately true of commercial mortgage brokerage. You will screwed out of a loan fee of $10,000 or more at least twice per year for your entire career. Now I am NOT talking about the borrower closing the loan and not paying you. That rarely happens. What these dastardly borrowers do is lie to you or cancel on you. You would be a flipping idiot not to pay a lousy $199 for my ninety-minute video training course, Fee Collection For Commercial Mortgage Brokers. It includes my famous fee agreement. Go ahead and ignore this section. You will cry, I absolutely guarantee you.


Wolf Joke

At a psychiatric ward: “Doctor, what should we do with the new guy in room six? He believes he’s a wolf.” Doctor: “Whatever you do, don’t let his grandmother visit!”


How To Generate Commercial Leads Like Turning On a Spigot

I have been marketing for commercial loans for almost 40 years. I have wasted well over $175,000 on marketing campaigns that were complete busts. Direct mail. Postcards. Classified ads. Magazine ads. Google ads. Complete busts. Here is what works.


How To Earn Huge Referral Fees

Please click here after viewing the video.

Referral Fees

Final Funny

Q:  What’s the proper plural of beer?

A:  Sixpack.

NMLS #167100

CA DRE #1330173


4811 Chippendale Drive, Suite 101

Sacramento, CA 95841

P: (916) 338-3232

F: (916) 338-2328


NMLS #103430

CA DRE #829677