MORTGAGE STUFF (C-Loans Client Letter)
You are receiving this letter because you are a commercial mortgage broker client of either Blackburne & Sons or C-Loans, Inc. Removal instructions are below. Today you'll learn about the Debt Yield Ratio, a new financial ratio the Big Boys in New York are using.
Joke Du Jour
A young man asked for a job with the circus, any job at all. The manager decided to give him a chance to become an assistant lion tamer and took him to the practice cage. The head lion tamer, a beautiful young woman, was just starting her rehearsal. Entering the cage, she removed her cape with a flourish and, standing in a gorgeous costume, motioned to a lion. Obediently the lion crept towards her and then rolled over twice. "Well," said the manager to the young man, "do you think you can learn to do that?" "I'm sure I could," he replied, "but first you'll have to get that lion out of there."
Private Money Permanent Loans
Most hard money lenders only make bridge loans. At Blackburne & Sons, we hate bridge loans. Yuck! I'm in the mortgage business to build a loan servicing portfolio. A bridge loan only stays on the book for one lousy year. That's a lot of work for just 12 little loan servicing fees.
Instead, we make permanent loans - 15 year loans with no prepayment penalty. Got a small commercial building that needs a permanent loan? Call Alicia Gandy at Blackburne & Sons at 916-338-3232 or email her at email@example.com.
Shirt Size Joke
A guy tells this story: While I was working in the men's section of a department store, a woman asked me to help her choose a white dress shirt for her husband. When I asked about his size, the woman looked stumped at first. Then her face brightened. She held up her hands, forming a circle with her forefingers and thumbs. "I don't know his size," she said, "but my hands fit perfectly around his neck."
C-Loans.com Adds 50 New Hard Money Lenders
The only lenders with a hearty appetite to make commercial loans today are the hard money lenders. Therefore C-Loans.com made a big push this month to add about 50 more hard money lenders to our list of 750 participating commercial lenders; so find a commercial deal and come meet these guys. And remember, C-Loans.com is free!
Turning 99 Joke
When a woman I know turned 99 years old, I went to her birthday party and took some photos. A few days later, I brought the whole batch of prints to her so she could choose her favorite. "Good Lord," she said as she was flipping through them, "I look like I'm a hundred."
Debt Yield Ratio
I was stunned to learn at the CMBA Commercial Real Estate Finance Conference that conduit lenders are no longer using the debt service coverage ratio to determine the maximum size of their loans. Instead, they are using some new ratio called the Debt Yield Ratio. Read more.
During a visit with my mother, who was in the hospital, I popped into the cafeteria for breakfast. I set a piece of bread on the moving toaster rack and waited for it to return golden brown. Instead, it got stuck all the way in the back. When I couldn't reach it, the woman in line next to me took control of the situation. Seizing a pair of tongs, she reached in and deftly fished out the piece of toast. "You must be an emergency-room worker," I joked. "No," she said, "an obstetrician."
Make Our Blog One of Your Home Pages
You can have multiple home pages, and since our blog has no graphics, the page loads quickly. This blog is the Blackburne family repository of commercial real estate finance knowledge. At least four times a week you'll read about some new terms, ratios, or concepts; so why not make it one of your home pages right now!
Bartenders and waiters have heard 'em all. But what we rarely hear is someone turning down a drink. "Nah, I better not have one," said one man after I offered him a glass of wine. "I have the world's worst stomach. I eat so many antacids that if I were to keel over dead right this minute, I'd leave my own chalk outline."
Line of Credit for Property Flippers in California
Are you buying California foreclosures and then flipping them? If so, please call me, George Blackburne, at 574-360-2486. I have a special line of credit program that you'll love.
We can go up to 60% loan-to-value on purchases of foreclosed property without appraisals. The rate is 8.9% and the fee is 3.5 points. These are 1-year loans, with the option of extending, for an additional fee, for one more year.
The minimum loan is $1.5 million, and the maximum loan is $10 million. These bridge loans can be used to either buy homes or commercial property. There is no prepayment penalty.
Remember, the property must be located in California. (This line of credit product is NOT available in other states.) If you have a deal in California, please call me, George Blackburne, on my cell phone at 574-360-2486. Did I mention California only?
Big Computer Joke
Trying to explain to our five-year-old daughter how much computers had changed, my wife pointed to our brand-new personal computer and told her that when he was in college, a computer with the same amount of power would have been the size of a house. Wide-eyed, our daughter asked, “How big was the mouse?”
Follow the Old Man on Twitter
You can follow George Blackburne III on Twitter and keep abreast of developments in commercial real estate finance and the economy.
This lady wrote: While in the 101st Airborne Division at Fort Campbell, Ky., my husband would often pass the base mascot, an eagle in a large cage. The bird's name, Sergeant Glory, was even engraved on a nearby plaque. One morning my husband saw Sergeant Glory give his handler a nasty bite while being fed. The next day a new plaque appeared on the bird's enclosure. It read "Private Glory."
Reuse Our Video Training Course Over and Over
If you order our famous 9-hour video course, How to Broker Commercial Mortgage Loans, you can use this training course again and again to train new loan agents in your office. The cost is still only $499.
Stone Age Joke
Our newer, high-speed computer was in the shop for repair, and my son was forced to work on our old model with the black-and-white printer. "Dad," he complained to me one day, "this is like we're living back in the 20th Century."
You Need Loan Servicing Income
The fastest and easiest way to build a loan servicing portfolio is to become a hard money lender. Our four-hour video course, How to Find Your Own Private Mortgage Investors, is just $499.
This lady wrote: Working as a pediatric nurse, I had the difficult assignment of giving immunization shots to children. One day I entered the examining room to give four-year-old Lizzie her needle. "No, no, no!" she screamed. "Lizzie," scolded her mother, "that's not polite behavior." With that, the girl yelled even louder, "No, thank you! No, thank you!"
Train Your Entire Staff in Commercial in One Day
You are paying a fortune to keep your doors open. You can't afford to throw away good commercial leads. For only $5,000 I will fly out to your office and train your entire staff in commercial mortgage marketing, underwriting, packaging, placement, and fee collection. Suddenly your income potential doubles with no increase in monthly overhead. I have already trained more than 50 companies. For details please call Alicia Gandy at 916-338-3232..
This guy wrote: One evening after dinner, my five-year-old son Brian noticed that his mother had gone out. In answer to his questions, I told him, "Mommy is at a Tupperware party." This explanation satisfied him for only a moment. Puzzled, he asked, "What's a Tupperware party, Dad?" I've always given my son honest answers, so I figured a simple explanation would be the best approach. "Well, Brian," I said, "at a Tupperware party, a bunch of ladies sit around and sell plastic bowls to each other." Brian nodded, indicating that he understood. Then he burst into laughter. "Come on, Dad," he said. "What is it really?"
Buy Commercial Leads for Just $1 to $2 Each
Most lead sellers want $20 to $50 apiece for commercial leads. C-Loans sells them for just $1 to $2 each - plus 37.5 basis points if you close the loan. Click here for more details.
Witness Protection Joke
As a promotional gimmick for my restaurant, I send out coupons offering people a free dinner on their birthdays. One day an anxious-sounding man called. "I got your card. How did you find me?" "From a mailing list I purchased from a supplier," I told him. "Why?" "It used my real name, and I'm in the Witness Protection Program. What's the name of the company?" I didn't want to say it, but I had to tell him the truth: Moving Targets.
Consult with George for Just $375/Hour
With just a 30 to 60 minute consultation I may be able to help you with your commercial mortgage marketing, your underwriting, your placement of a particular commercial deal, or your fee collection problems. Click here for details.
First Trade Show With George IV
My oldest son, George IV, accompanied me to the California Mortgage Bankers Association Western States CREF Conference last week in Las Vegas. What a thrill it was to show him around a trade show ... and show him off to my old buddies. I've dreamed of this for 25 years.
Dr. Pepper Joke
Waking up in the recovery room after surgery, I discovered my throat was dry and sore from the oxygen tube they had inserted. One of the nurses asked if I would like some ice chips to help alleviate the problem. "You know what," I said to her, "I'll give you ten dollars if you bring me a soft drink." "Ten dollars?" she said. "Mr. Blackburne, this is a hospital. A Dr Pepper here costs a hundred dollars."
All you have to do is know where you're going. The answers will come to you of their own accord ~ Earl Nightingale