Joke Du Jour

"New York is a great town, though. If you're here and want a one-of-a-kind souvenir, be sure to take home the police sketch of your assailant." -- Dave Letterman

Use the Lender Vault to Buy Brand New Leads

C-Loans is a race, not a rate-bidding contest. If the deal is bankable, the first banker to reach the borrower usually wins the deal. If the deal needs to go hard money, the first hard money broker to reach the borrower usually wins the deal. The borrower seldom returns the calls of the other lenders.

If you check your Lender Vault every few hours, you can buy C-Loans leads that are less than an hour old. Even if you are not listed at the very top of the Suggested Lender List, by using your Lender Vault, you can get first crack at the most desirable loans in the marketplace.

There is a reason why the top guys on C-Loans have closed more than 30 loans each. It's not because they are super-salesman. It's because they see the deals first. They cherry pick. By investing a lousy $1 to $9 in some leads, you can beat even the top fliers to the punch. Sooner or later the light is going to go on for you, "Geesh, I coulda had a V-8." The Lender Vault is one incredible tool.

Coast Guard Joke

This lady officer wrote: "I overheard my father telling a family friend about my newly-assigned mission in the U.S. Coast Guard. I work on a cutter that escorts cruise ships and international vessels under the bridges in California's Bay Area. But what my father told his friend was, "She's involved in some sort of escort service."

Current Standings

Watch out for Cameron Butler of Mission Oaks National Bank. He closed three loans for us this month, and he has even more deals in process.

1. Robert Velin Integrity Financial Group 36
2. Les Agisim TCRM Commercial Corp. 33
3. Cameron Butler Mission Oaks National Bank 24
4. Rick Gnafakis Metwest Commercial Lender 23
5. Bobbi Butler Wells Fargo Bank Business Real Estate 21
6. Randall Beach National Apartment Finance, Inc. 20
7. Paul Elis PMB Capital 19
8. Commercial Direct, A division of Bayview 17
9. David Smyle Benchmark Financial 17
10. Paul Szkotak Fedfirst Commercial Capital 15
11. Mike Brown Community Commerce Bank 12
12. Shannen Bradley Business Partners, LLC. 12
13. Dan Gushue Lockheed Federal Credit Union 10
14. Candy George Fairway Independent Mortgage Company 10
15. Peter Hayden Convex Capital 9
16. Cherian Arratuculam Placer Sierra Bank 8
17. Vito Piche American Mortgage Express Corp. 8
18. Larry Falk R.C. Temme Corporation 8
19. Robert Rice Union Bank of California 8
20. Alicia Gandy Blackburne & Brown 8
21. Michael Luther Republic Bank 8
22. Anthony Christopher Lehman Brothers Small Business Finance 7
23. Michael Thurman Blackburne & Brown 7
24. Daniel Reichel 1st Centennial Bank 7
25. Michael Southard Security National Capital 7
26. Mike Sanders Capital Finance 7
27. Carl Lindros Mortgage Company of Santa Barbara 7
28. Enrique Gomez Commercial Funding Corp. 6
29. Bill Webster Lakeside Mortgage Fund, LLC 6
30. Marlene Lucido TCRM Commercial Corp. 6
31. Wes Ady Gourley & Gourley 6
32. Chris Baughman First National Bank Texas 6
33. Jennifer Eltinge Comerica Bank 6
34. Tom McHugh Metwest Commercial Lender 6
35. Michael Terroni UPS Capital 5
36. Scott Gilliland Silver Hill Financial, LLC 5
37. Dan Brodbeck First National Bank of America 5
38. Jon Moseley United Community Bank 5
39. John Ayers Lehman Brothers Bank, FSB 5

Parker Pen Joke

When Parker Pen marketed a ballpoint pen in Mexico, its ads were supposed to say "It won't leak in your pocket and embarrass you." However, the company mistakenly thought the spanish word "embarazar" meant embarrass. Instead the ads said that "It won’t leak in your pocket and make you pregnant."

Five Closings is the Magic Number

Once you have closed five loans for C-Loans, we will probably let you join C-Loans as a "lender", even if you get laid off by the bank.

Perdue Chicken Joke

Chicken-man Frank Perdue's slogan, "It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken," got terribly mangled in another Spanish translation. A photo of Perdue with one of his birds appeared on billboards all over Mexico with a caption that explained, "It takes a hard man to make a chicken aroused."

Waste of Marketing Dollars

This month I attended both the Western States Commercial Real Estate Finance Conference and Crittenden's Commercial Mortgage Broker's Conference. At both of these conferences I saw booths that must have cost their lenders $15,000 to $20,000 for booth rent, shipping expenses, set-up fees, travel expenses, meals and manpower salaries. How many leads do you think each lender will be able to directly trace back to appearing at that trade show? Forty leads? Fifty? And most of the leads won't even roughly qualify.

Assuming an average cost of $4 each, for the same $15,000 a lender can buy from his Lender Vault exactly 3,750 perfect leads. I say "perfect leads" because each loan will be the right loan amount, the right loan type, secured on the right property type, located in the right county of the right state and the borrower will have the right credit. Please be sure to forward this newsletter to your head of marketing.

Willie Nelson Joke

Willie Nelson's public statement regarding being caught with a bag of marijuana recently: "It's a good thing I had a bag of marijuana. If it had been a bag of spinach, I'd be dead by now."

Hour-Old Leads Are Cleaner and Stronger

You have probably never seen very many hour-old leads. Oh my goodness! They are sooo perfect. So why don't you see more of them? Because they often fail to reach the lenders in the middle of the pack. One of the top six lenders will frequently pick the deal off long before the borrower chooses to apply to your bank.

You can level the playing field and get access to these wonderful hour-old leads by investing a whopping $1 to $9 each and buying them using your Lender Vault.

Adoption Joke

After years of wondering why he didn't look like his younger sister or brother, Mark finally got up the nerve to ask his mother if he was adopted. "Yes, you were son," his mother said as she started to cry softly. "But it didn't work out, so they brought you back."

Got a Buddy Who Wants to Join C-Loans?

If you have a banker buddy who might be interested in joining C-Loans as a commercial lender, we'll give you $60 in lead-purchasing credits for referring him to C-Loans. Or we'll give you a free copy of of our training video, "How to Market for Commercial Loans" ($199). Simply send his name, company, phone and email address to Alicia Gandy.

Football Tickets Joke

Sarah was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a football game on TV. Suddenly, she burst out laughing. "Listen to this, there's a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for season tickets." "Hmmm," her husband said, not bothering to look away. Sarah said teasingly, "Would you swap me for season tickets?" "Absolutely not," he said, "the season's more than half over."

Still Not a True Believer in C-Loans?

Do you remember your statistics class in business school? You'll recall that if you take a large enough sample of a population that pretty soon the sample is an accurate reflection of the population.

C-Loans is blessed to be the number one organic site on Google for our industry (thank you, dear Lord). As a result, we enjoy over 100 commercial loan app's every day. Our 100 commercial loan applications probably represent a significant sample of all new commercial loan app's submitted each day to banks across the country.

Therefore statistically C-Loans has to be a very close match to the overall commercial loan marketplace. If 10% of all commercial borrowers are a bunch of big story-tellers and dreamers, the same is probably true for C-Loans. If 40% of all commercial loan app's are hot and qualified, the same is probably true for C-Loans. What we offer to you is a nice loan volume. There is probably a pre-screened commercial loan app in your email box right now.

Offspring Joke

A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

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