C-LOANS
LENDER LETTER Joke
Du Jour
Two
missionaries in Africa were apprehended by a tribe of very
hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water,
built a huge fire under it, and left them there to boil.
A
few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh
uncontrollably.
The
other missionary couldn't believe it. He said, ''What's
wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're
gonna eat
us!
What could possibly be funny at a time like this?''
The
other missionary replied, ''I just peed in the soup!''
C-Loans
Evolving into "The" MLS?
In
a few weeks our programmers will be unveiling a major upgrade
to C-Loans. Participating lenders will suddenly be
able to search C-Loans for deals. "Show me all
the bridge loan requests in Rockland County, New York between
$1 million and $20 million secured by office buildings where
the borrower's credit is at least average."
Just
as LoopNet has emerged as the de facto MLS for
commercial properties available for sale, it is very possible
that C-Loans will emerge as the de facto MLS for
commercial loans.
So
treasure your lifetime lender points. You earn 10
lifetime lender points whenever you close a loan for C-Loans.
I predict that within three years that there will be several
commissioned loan officers making in excess of $1 million
per year from just their C-Loans leads.
Hunter
Joke
A
couple of hillbilly hunters were out in the woods when one
of them fell to the ground. He didn't seem to be breathing,
and his eyes were rolled back in his head. The
other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
He gasps to the operator, "My friend is dead! What
can I do?"
The
operator, in a calm and soothing voice, says, "Alright,
take it easy. I can help. First, let's make
sure he's dead."
There
is silence, and then a gun shot is heard. The hunter
comes back on the line. "OK. Now what??"
C-Loans
Has Another Monster Month
It's
only June 23rd, and C-Loans has already closed over $15
million in commercial loans this month. Yet there
are still commercial loan officers who doubt whether C-Loans
deals actually close. Hellooooo? 450 loans so
far. A third of a billion dollars ... and
that's before we even had a small budget to start advertising.
It's time to really jump on the C-Loans train!
Nearsighted
Joke
I
came home from work last night exhausted. I
said to my wife, "I need my glasses checked. I'm
so nearsighted I nearly worked myself to death."
Perplexed,
the wife asked, "What's being nearsighted got to do with
working yourself to death?"
"I
couldn't tell whether the boss was watching me or not, so
I had to work the whole time!"
C-Loans Just Doubled It's Click Purchases
If
your lender score is over 100%, you should have noticed
a handsome increase in your loan volume in the past few
weeks. C-Loans is investing some serious money into
more pay-per-click advertising. We have doubled our
advertising budget. In addition, we have moved up
nicely in the search engine rankings.
Facelift
Joke
"I
don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have
face-lifts
until my ears meet." --- Rita Rudner
"Hey,
You Big Conduit Guys!" (and Ladies)
The
only thing keeping you from closing a ton of huge conduit
deals is your suspicion about working internet deals.
We can understand your suspicion. Five years ago almost
a dozen dot-com's spent collectively $20 million trying
to create a workable commercial mortgage portal. It's
fair to say that as a group they failed miserably.
I think Redbricks.com, for example, threw $1.5 million at
the problem and never closed a single loan.
But
their model was flawed. They wanted some poor schmuck
to spend four hours filling out their huge loan app's without
ever speaking to a human being. Imagine if some poor
borrower spent four hours completing this long loan app
on-line, only to have some human finally send him a curt
email, "Sorry, we are no longer doing self storage
deals." Can you imagine the frustration?!
No wonder no one filled out their prodigious forms.
The
C-Loans model is totally different. We don't try to
streamline the processing of commercial loans. It's
not the key step. Once the borrower puts up his $10,000
for third party reports, the lender is NOT going to lose
the deal if it takes an extra 10 days to close the loan.
The
C-Loans model recognizes that the key step is getting the
deal off the street. Some smooth-talking conduit loan
agent needs to whisper sweet nothings in the ear of the
borrower. A computer is lousy at sweet talk.
You heavy-weight salesmen need to make that sale.
So
all we try to do at C-Loans is get the deal into your hands
as soon as possible. It shouldn't be hard for you
to accept that a modern borrower would choose to use the
internet to test the waters, especially when he can approach
through C-Loans a selection of almost every major bank and
conduit lender in the country.
So
when your C-Loans app's arrive, please work them!
And work them quickly. You cannot expect to land a
hot conduit lead if it takes you more than an hour or two
to call the borrower.
Getting
Old Joke
This
sweet wife wrote: My husband, a big-time sports fan,
was watching a football game with our grandchildren.
He had just turned 75 and was feeling a little wistful.
"You know," he said to our grandson, Nick, "It's not easy
getting old."
"Don't
worry, Grandpa," Nick said cheerily. "Maybe you'll go into
overtime."
Spin
Turndowns into Gold
Your
lender score not only affects your loan volume but also
the quality of your loan app's. Good borrowers
don't bother to scroll to the bottom of the Suggested Lender
List. Therefore
the wise and hungry commercial loan officer will work hard
to improve his lender score.
One
super-easy way to jump to the top of the Suggested Lender
List is to collect the email addresses of every commercial
borrower that you are forced to turn down.
Then,
if you go to our referral page, you
simply type in the email address of the borrower.
If the borrower applies for a loan through C-Loans, you
will enjoy 5 extra lender bonus points for the next 30 days.
If you do this six times, you suddenly will have a lender
score of 130.
A
lender score of 130 should be enough to land you among the
Top Six Lenders (the Holy Grail of C-Loans) on the Suggested
Lender List. Suddenly your cup will overflow.
Please
bookmark our referral page right now.
If
Your Bank Will Lend On -
Casinos,
Marinas, Gentlemen's Clubs (nudie bar), Movie Theaters,
or Bowling Alleys, would
you please send an email to Alicia
Gandy? "Alicia, ABC Bank will make loans
on marinas, movie theaters, and bowling alleys."
|
